Grateful

I've been feeling extra grateful for our little Sara recently.

Three weeks ago, two of my uncles were irrigating a canal that runs through their property, their father's old farm up in Idaho. While they were irrigating, they saw something in the water, and to their horror, they pulled out an 18-month-old little girl who had fallen into the canal one and a half miles upstream. One week later, after fighting for her life long enough for her parents and family to say their goodbyes, that little girl left this life and returned to her Father in Heaven.

I never met little Preslee, but she was only 10 days older than our own little girl. That fact alone kept hitting me close to home; that this little girl was the same age as Sara. Just a baby. It made me put myself in their situation and think, "What if that were Sara? What if that happened to us?" Can you imagine leaving your baby with a sitter or family member to go out for a few hours, not knowing you are about to receive the phone call no parent ever wants to receive? A phone call saying the worst has happened? I just can't help but think how hard it must be to lose a child. And perhaps even harder, to lose your only child (like they did, and like we would if anything ever happened to Sara) and to go back to being.....just you. No longer a mom and a dad. No longer the parents of your own perfect little creation. I just can't imagine. Don't want to imagine.

I have been thinking about this a lot over the past three weeks. Every time I get frustrated with Sara and start to lose my cool, I think of how hard it would be to lose her. I think of how much worse it would be if she were to suddenly be gone. I think of how distraught I would feel if I didn't get to see her smiling face every day, or if I never got to hear her sing "E-I-E-I-O" again, or if the hug and kiss she gave me before going to bed tonight was the last one I'll ever get. Thinking about going through what Preslee's family is going through makes even the frustrating 'toddler throwing a tantrum' moments seem like the most important moments of my life. Moments I never want to lose or forget. Moments I don't want to ruin by raising my voice, when really all she probably needs is more attention from her mommy.

I've realized that every moment I spend with my little girl really is the most important moment of my life. I've realized that food thrown on the floor and embarrassing temper tantrums in public and a toddler who nearly refuses to take a nap do not equal the end of the world. Those moments are only part of the package. The rest of the deal includes a little girl whose face lights up when you walk into her room in the morning. A little girl who cracks you up every time she "talks" to you in unintelligible babbles, and then gives you a cheesy grin and looks at you as if you should be laughing along with the hilarious joke she just told. A little girl who would rather sit on your lap and sing "Itsy-bitsy Spider" with you than almost anything else in the world. Those moments make the frustrating moments worth it.

I love my little girl so much. I am so grateful to get to spend each and every day with her. I want to live in each moment and never forget what a blessing Sara is in our lives. I am making an effort to make each moment count, because you never know when those moments might be gone.

I love you Sara.

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You can read more about Preslee and all the lives she touched during the last week of her life right here on her parent's blog.

More Cousins!

Sara was lucky enough to get to spend several days last week with her California cousins who were up here in Utah for a visit. They stayed with us for 4 days (in our 2 bedroom apartment! -- they slept on the living room floor, couch, and port-a-crib). I think Sara started to think they were living with us for good! After they left, Sara kept asking for her cousin Kaya every time she woke up in the morning or from a nap. Luckily we got to see them again a few days later since they were staying at my Aunt's house too.

We kept trying to get a good photo of the three of them. Here are some of my favorites.

You have to click on this photo to see the full size so you can take a look at Sara's cute face. And check out her little hand on Kaya's leg. So cute!

Sara, Kaya and Eli watching a movie at my Aunt Marie's.

On our couch with my sister-in-law Holly trying desperately to get them to smile!

And one in the crib. C'mon Sara, look at the camera!

We also tried to get a "group hug" photo, but this is the best we could get:

I think Sara was throwing them off, because Eli and Kaya sure are good at giving hugs for the camera!

Here's a cute photo of Kaya pushing Sara in the stoller.

And, just because he's so cute, here's one of Eli's silly face:

It was great to see you Paul and Holly!

I Heart Hogle

We went to the zoo one day while my brother and his family were here.

I'm still not sure Sara is old enough to enjoy it. Her favorite part was the water feature at the entrance...

But don't worry, she also really loved the drinking fountain!

It's shaped like a lion, so it counts as seeing an animal at the zoo, right?!

We got to meet Zuri, the zoo's new baby elephant. There were a few rhino's that we got up close and personal with (or that we viewed from behind the safety of our fence rather). The most action we saw from any animal was from the penguins who treated us to a lovely performance of jumping off the rocks into the water pool. Strangely, they didn't seem to know how to get back out of the water once they got in (although they eventually figured it out).

We got a pretty good photo in front of the giraffes.

And what's a Hogle Zoo trip without a photo in front of the "Measure Up" sign?

We even ran into one of Rob's cousins and family who were also spending the day at the zoo! What a co-ink-ee-dink!

Here's Sara and Kaya looking at...something. I think it was the monkeys.

And here's an attempt of getting a photo of the three of us while on the train ride. Might have been a good one if I had taken my glasses off.

We had a good time at the zoo! But for Sara's sake, I think our next outing should be to a water park.

ice cream with cousins

Not a bad way to spend an afternoon.

Just checking my email

I've been really busy this week.

I meant to post about the 4th of July earlier, but I've been extraordinarily busy this week! So here it is a week later:

{How we celebrated Independence Day, 2010 edition}



On Saturday July 3rd I ran in a community 5k fun run and accomplished both my goals: run the whole way without stopping and finish under 30 minutes. Way to go me!

Later that night we went to some friend's house and ate some yummy grilled steaks and corn on the cob. This was also Sara's first experience with firecrackers, sparklers, and pop-its. She loved them all.





Sunday was spent at church singing patriotic hymns and wearing Red White and Blue church outfits. Then to the in-laws for a delicious 4th of July feast.

On Monday we had breakfast with friends in the morning, enjoyed a nice siesta in the afternoon, and more fireworks in the evening. This time we suffered an episode of bad parenting and let Sara hold a sparkler all by herself, with very close supervision of course.



And Sara loved the pop-its so much, we had to buy some more so she could stomp on them to her heart's content (which she did).




Happy (belated) Independence Day America!!

If you chance to meet a frown...

Do not let it stay...


Quickly turn it upside-down and smile that frown away!

snuggly